"They Have No Idea Who I Am!"

On a star-studded Sunday afternoon in Los Angeles (something called the Academy Awards was about to take center stage just a few miles down the road moments after the Northern Trust Open concluded) as former PGA Tour luminaries Retief Goosen and Vijay Singh were trying to write their own fairy tale story of golfing redemption, it was a "young", virtual unknown from Alameda, CA who stole the show. A man named Hahn, James Hahn, rose to the occasion like a grizzled Tour vet. Despite this being his maiden foray into a PGA Tour playoff, Hahn succeeded in dramatic fashion, and in doing so, commanded a winning presence on one of golf's toughest stages.

Coming into this week -- his 65th career start on the PGA Tour -- he might as well have been a top-secret, covert golfing spy from South Korea, even though he had managed his way to 9 Top 25 finishes, four Top 10's and a flirtatious dance with victory at the 2013 AT&T Pebble Beach Pro-Am, where he finished tied for 3rd. However, after his mildly successful stint in early 2013 -- once removed from the comforting, familiar sunshine of the West Coast swing -- Hahn faded back into anonymity despite some new-found modest fame, which resulted from a silly dance he did after sinking a nice birdie putt at the Loudest Hole in Golf at the Waste Management Open (Phoenix). From there, Hahn struggled mightily, missing the cut in 29 of his next 52 tourney starts over the subsequent twenty months of play.

Then, after a sluggish start to the 2014-15 wrap-around season, the 2015 calendar brought renewed hope for Hahn. And that hope turned to promise at the Sony Open in Hawaii (T-26) and again at the Humana Challenge in Palm Springs, where he finished with a Sunday 65 to tie 20th place. But ultimately, his star would shine the brightest when the plot thickened and the tension was ratcheted up the most at the Northern Trust Open, played annually on the famed and birdie-stingy Riviera Country Club track.

"Winning is awesome! Everyone wants me to do the dance (go here if you still haven't seen this guy bust a move that would make Young MC blush); I don't even think they know my name," Hahn quipped abashedly during his post-win presser before brandishing another Oscar-winning smile. "A couple of guys in the locker room were calling me 'John' (chuckles), like (as in) John Huh. It's amazing how many people don't know me and...I mean, that's kinda cool." With another sheepish grin, Hahn completes his aw-shucks train of thought, "They have no idea who I am!"

Well James, I think that may very well change after your heroic display of golf in a 3-hole playoff that outlasted a resurgent Paul Casey and eventually thwarted the talent of a current golfing luminary in his own right, Dustin Johnson (8 Tour wins). Hahn made two clutch putts, the first of which was on the beguiling par-4 10th hole despite DJ's almost sure-thing birdie putt from 4 feet, and the second on the par-3 14th hole from about 24 feet, a momentum-shifting putt that put the pressure squarely on Johnson's broad shoulders. Alas, it was meant to be for the Tour's "Youtube" sensation, who proudly hails as one of South Korea's "American" sons, as DJ could not summon the deft touch needed to sink a tricky left-to-right putt that would have forced a 4th playoff hole.

Talk about your Cinderella story stolen from a Hollywood script!! Oh wait, that script was already written for Kevin Costner in the movie "Tin Cup", but only this time, the real-life ending was more than just a metaphorically happy one. This time around, the pro-golfing protagonist with the winning smile triumphed in the heat of the Tour's pressure-cooking crucible. A story almost too good to be true, the 33 year-old Cal-Berkeley Bear dazzled the masses with his golfing flair instead of simply entertaining them with his Gangnam-inspired impression of Fred Astair.

Speaking of entertainment, this kid has a flair for the dramatic on grand stages. Here he is holing out for birdie from the 6th fairway of Pebble Beach in 2013:

Who knows whether this breakthrough win will end up being the foretaste of many thrilling tourney triumphs to come, but one thing is certain: this man knows how to have fun on the golf course. Perhaps his more free-spirited demeanor -- quite refreshing when cool stoicism is the preferred trait on Tour -- is rooted in the perspective he gained as a former Nordstrom's shoe salesman well before he re-launched his golf career in 2007. After hawking Jimmy Choos to discerning, fashion-obsessed women at metro LA Nordstrom stores, Hahn would go on to hone his skills on both the Korean and Canadian Tours, where he most certainly learned how to put on a show as Jimmy Hahn, the self-deprecating, happy-go-lucky touring professional.

The mettle-tested veteran of "mini-tour" golf once found himself down to his last $200 before a T-8 in Edmonton won him a $3,000 check to barely keep his Big Tour golf dreams alive. A year later, in his return to Edmonton, Hahn would win the event. After a character-building missed opportunity to earn his tour card at the 2010 PGA Tour Q-School event, he went on to the web.com Tour, where he played for 3 years, winning once (in a playoff) and finishing 2nd in the season-ending 2012 Tour Championship. Having earned his PGA Tour card the hard way, Hahn knew he would eventually be ready to seize his chance when it arrived. And arrive it did at the famed "Riv", where he seemingly relished the opportunity to take on the starring role, in the process upstaging the likes of DJ, Sergio Garcia and the already anointed next "big thing" on Tour, Jordan Spieth.

Hahn excelled in an arduous arena where most newcomers falter and, as a result, he won't ever have to sweat the small stuff. Well, at least not for the next two years of "exempt" status on Tour. Having already survived golf's gauntlet of mini-tour uncertainty, frustrating runs of missed cuts on every tour, and even the embarrassment of not having the money to pay his caddy fee as a fledgling touring pro in Canada, Hahn will now be able to treat his wife to the new car he promised her if and when he finished in the Top 5. Now, after crashing through the ceiling of hard-to-earn premier wins on the toughest tour of them all, Hahn can entertain the notion of a bigger, more improbable dream: a qualification berth into the President's Cup. As an American. Playing in Seoul, South Korea, where he was born. Fancy THAT Hollywood!! But no matter what happens going forward, he will forever have stories like this one to tell to his daughter, who is slated to "tee off" in the game of life in about three weeks' time:

"I was walking up the stairs -- and I played with Jim Furyk and Dustin Johnson -- and this little kid is like: 'Okay, YAY! Good job Jim, good job Dustin, good job uhh?'" (laughing as he goes). He had nothing to say, he was like: 'Who's that guy?'" And even when I was signing hats after the round, I asked some guy, 'Hey is there a playoff, what's going on?'" And he responded, 'Yeah, Dustin Johnson, Paul Casey and some other guy'" And I was like, (making an autograph signing motion), 'Oh yeah? Okay, cool, here's your hat.'" It's definitely humbling, I don't expect anyone to know my name...I just play golf for a living."

And play it very well indeed Mr. Hahn. Time to chase that next dream starting in April at Augusta!

A New Kind of Tiger (Trunk) Slam??

Yesterday afternoon in La Jolla, CA at the Farmer's Insurance Open, not even a full week removed from his highest official score ever recorded in a PGA Tour event -- a mind-jolting and previously inconceivable 82 -- Tiger Woods found himself once again in an increasingly familiar place: a parking lot gingerly removing his golf shoes before slamming the trunk on yet another premature withdrawal from an official event. 

Only this time it occurred at Torrey Pines, the lifelong playground of the former #1 player in the world, a place where he had perfected the dramatic ending for his 14th and last major win (six long years ago), and lifted the trophy seven other times. Sadly, this "walk-off" ending didn't occur late on a Sunday afternoon 18th green. Instead this one originated on the 13th green of the North Course, proceeded past the clubhouse and eventually terminated at his Porsche into which Tiger couldn't even lift his golf bag.

In what has become an all too familiar sight during the last two Tour seasons, Tiger has three times as many WD's and missed cuts as he does Top 25 finishes. Let that sink in for a moment before reading on. Such results are beyond comprehension for a player once accustomed to making and re-writing history with his brilliance on the course. Now he's a limping, scuffling sideshow on the course; a less churlish, yet intriguing circus act off the course for the folks that write and talk about golf for a living, as well as armchair bloggers like myself.


Perhaps in time, just as Phil said, Eldrick Tont Woods will return to being Tiger, and indeed have the last laugh. But for now, it looks as though this latest Tiger tale of the strange and surreal has resumed Woods' fascinating descent from the lofty perch of the world's greatest-ever golfer.(*) And this latest dizzying drop has propelled Tiger into the depths of what seems to resemble a paralyzing hacker's despair. Every bit of it has been compelling drama, the most tantalizing reality TV to watch, an unpredictable tragic comedy unfolding before us. And I am loving every minute of it!!

(*) Apologies to Mr. Nicklaus whose career achievements and longevity are beginning to look even more remarkable every time Tiger's back tightens, neck stiffens or swing falters.

I know I shouldn't allow myself to indulge in such schadenfreudian delight at Tiger's tumultuous misfortune, but you know what they say about karma right? What comes around usually goes around...then suddenly hits a tree branch, ricochets off some rocks and crashes deep into the woods of darkness and desperation (to paraphrase Gary McCord), eventually leading to a proverbial golfer's WD from grace, if you will. Seems to be par for the course these days for one of the world's greatest, self-serving and spoiled sports-brats.

While there is certainly no love-lost for me with respect to the spectacle that is Tiger (and "fanboy" golf), I do realize there is something quite sad and depressing about Tiger's current state of confusion and current golfing ineptitude. After all, I am first and foremost a golfing fool, who knows the frustrating vagaries of this cruel game all too well, and yet continues to allow himself to suffer at the unrelenting hands of golf's mesmerizing lifelong journey -- bad back, "glute" stretches and all. 

Yet, I can't help but take great pleasure in seeing the heretofore surly genius -- admired almost as equally for his ability to wag the golf media dog as his ability to wield mystical golfing magic -- now serving up a delicious stew of "swing release patterns", "glute (in)activation", and even Tin Cup-pian hosel-rocket chili peppers (beware Lee Janzen) as hot, spicy seasoning, all of which the scribes and TV pundits will gobble up readily, and all too greedily. 

I mean, talk about getting your glute-tonous "maximus" bang for your speculation -- and humor activation -- buck!! And this time, it's not just Brandel and Johnny doing their level best to skewer and roast Tiger for his constant swing tinkering on the nightly and weekend golf speculation rotisserie spit. The "Hot Now" sign at the "Hot Takery Bakery" is now flashing like Tiger's toothy, Cheshire grin used to in the press tent after each of his 79 Tour wins.

Alas, is Tiger just playing the media again and bending them to his every whim, only to wind up as the Big Cat who swallowed the canary once again? Au contraire mes amis! While something akin to manipulation may have been quite plausible pre-back surgery, things are much, much different now. No longer afforded the benefit of the doubt by any sage media member, Tiger and his PR minions have seemingly lost control of the upper hand. Not to mention Tiger has been drifting for awhile now and has recently run aground of those jagged, rocky realities known as age and burn-out. Yes, burn-out. 

Tiger has been IS a control freak -- or  was the object of Sergeant Earl's controlling influence -- most all of his life and, prior to the 2009 PGA Championship at Hazeltine, had suffered very little resistance along his breathtaking collision course with destiny. Eventually, all control freaks reach a breaking point and the Tiger we saw at Torrey Pines looked like someone who had long surpassed his, fire hydrant or otherwise. On the telecast, he appeared to me as a gimpy and defeated soul, resigned to the fact that he can no longer simply will himself to overcome when the golf ball doesn't bounce his way.

Not only has the late-30's Tiger lost his ability to overcome physical obstacles and challenges, he has long since lost his firm grip of complete control: he can no longer steer the message to fit his egotistical superiority complex that was borne of being the best golfer on the planet. In fact, now he's rarely the best golfer under the starter's tent in his Thursday morning group. 

And to make matters worse, he's once again the "butt" of the golfing joke du jour. Add it to all the others and now there are almost as many Tiger jokes as holes on a golf course (insert perverted sex-addiction joke here). And the laughing can be heard everywhere: from the tee box "glute" crack with your buds, to the grill room "skank" shot issued from the bar stool, to the gallery suppressed chuckles at the sight of another bladed chip, to the TV production truck and then out of Nick Faldo's (a golfing control freak if there ever was one) mouth in the form of bio-kinetic musings about the human "sacrum!" I wish I was so creative, but sadly, even my perverse mind couldn't have made that one up.

Somehow and at some point, after the healing is done, and the abs and glutes have been fully re-engaged and activated, Tiger will need to look himself over in the mirror and make certain he is ready to fully commit to writing the final verse of this master-stroke symphony. And there is time for him to change the tenor of how it is sung, for it would be a damn shame to let his bad back, swing-change obsessions or Rachel Uchitel's tabloid expose inject long-lasting dissonance. Oh what a beautiful noise!! ;)

But when that time arrives, Tiger must realize it is time to "sac-rum up", stop over-analyzing, strap on the red Sunday cape and tenaciously stare down adversity in all of its "yippy" and uncertain mystery in order to salvage one last run at Jack's Legend. Because the longer he keeps messing around with technique and form, the less likely it is he will ever regain his position of greatest perceived substance: as THE unquestioned best ever, an intrepid golfing intimidator who thwarts all comers at any cost, even to the detriment of his own image. 

Or is this latest twist peeling away another layer of invincibility, thus revealing more evidence to the emergence of a new and vulnerable Tiger, one who is still capable of winning, but not one of epic dominance? Is this the new kinder and gentler Tiger? The one who has gained perspective and can now give in and go with the flow without having to control every little thing? Perhaps Tiger is now more accepting (and even content with) of the idea he only needs to be a hero to his children and a loving, supportive boyfriend who is simply thankful for every day he gets to play golf for a living? 

The greatest thing about golf is the story you don't expect or can't predict. And Tiger will still continue to deliver in that regard for the foreseeable future. Just not between the ropes nearly as much as most would hope.